Aviana starts school tomorrow. I am so excited for her. I think she will love it. We have decided on two days a week. We also decided to send her on the bus.
They came to check her wheelchair last week, and I just had to take a picture of the cute little, (or short if you prefer ; ) bus. She will be the only one riding. I just know she will thoroughly enjoy the entire experience.
I, on the other hand, will be a wreck. At least at first. As my mom always says, "everything is difficult at first, and then it gets easier." Such fine words, from such a fine mommy. I can't imagine sending her off to school...disabled. The most difficult part for me is - if anything were to happen, she's not able to tell me. That rips me up inside and causes me to lose sleep at night.
Oh well, it's what's best for her and so it will be.
Like I have said, I've been slightly out of sorts with this headache medication and so all weekend I was asking Dave, "are you sure we have everything ready for Aviana for school?" Well, today I figured out the answer to that question and it was 'no!' We were at the mall and I didn't even think to get her a new backpack. So I went online, and of course the one I want is catalog only.
What to do. What to do. Do I dare brave the drawer? You know the one. The one that contains many of the things we can't bear to see from before the accident. Do I unbury the backpack I searched many towns to find for when my healthy child was off to preschool?
Well, I decided to bring the darkness to light, because these are the very things I feel I need not be such a wuss about. When the Little Lady and my eyes first met, I can't lie....it hurt like hell. Actually, all the moments thereafter felt the same. It's amazing the damage a simple, sweet, little ladybug can ensue on one's earthy soul.
As I sit wiping away this steady stream of tears, I think - there's really something to be said about wussing out!
Avi ~ My Love
I wish you the best first day of school ever. I will miss not being able to kiss you anytime I want throughout the day!
I pray you are surrounded in the most kind hearted people your school has to offer. My hope is that all those people sought those positions purely for their love of people such as yourself. Because you my love, you are something extraordinary.
And by the way, if anyone hurts you...I will find out, and I will hurt them too.
All my love to you,